One of Those Day

Every week at the moment we have 'one of those days.' You know the ones where you have lots planned but none of it works out? Sometimes this happens because plans fall through or something that should have been simple and quick gets complicated and takes a lot longer. Round here 'those days' happen when Connor is having a hard time for whatever reason...teething, going through a growth spurt or developmental leap, just feeling a bit overwhelmed with life in general or perhaps being a little under the weather. Whatever it is that causes it he just can't cope with everyday life like he normally does. There are lots and lots of tears that take longer to get over and start so much more easily than usual. There is a lot of whining and a constant need for cuddles...often very wriggly ones. Whatever we try to do is not quite the right thing. Life is just too hard.

Its on days like this that I am incredibly grateful for the fact that I can sack everything off and just be with him at home for the day. I have no obligation to leave the house if I don't fancy it. I do not have to go out to work. I do not have to get the house sparkling clean or even prepare meals for anyone but the two of us (and there's always a fish finger sandwich or a frozen pizza for the days when even simple cooking is too high a mountain to climb.)

So, on 'one of those days' we take a deep breath and ride the stormy sea together with lots of play and singing and slow, slow movement from activity to activity. And do you know what? Although my ears would rather not have to hear the whining and crying that happens many many times throughout the day, and I'd rather he wasn't suffering whatever feelings and frustrations have taken hold of him, I love 'those days'. 'Those days' remind me that this is why I wanted to be a mama. To live every moment of being this little boy's mum, even the shitty bits...maybe especially the shitty bits. Because although it is not always easy (and I certainly used to find it really hard but have got better with practise and an understanding that "this too shall pass") its real and its not the sugar coated vision of life that I post on Instagram. It is in some small part the antidote to it.

And at the end of 'one of those days' I feel a deep sense of achievement despite the fact that I have at most done a load single of laundry and there are still pots to be washed by the sink and the floor is filthy and that pile of stuff is still on the bottom step of the stairs and I didn't manage to ring the garage to book the car in for it's MOT and there is no milk in the fridge and we had a made up meal of whatever we could find that roughly went together and the library books are now overdue and the toys are still scattered all over the sitting room floor and Connor has no nappies for tomorrow morning.

We have still made it through the day. We have still had lots of cuddles and a few smiles and giggles when the sea was a little calmer. We have still felt the deepest sort of love that it is possible to feel. And I am proud of my boy and I am proud of myself for coping with the storm because everything else can wait. None of it matters right now. And that is a great feeling. That it is possible to live a day where nothing matters but my boy. Pure bliss. I'm already looking forward to the next one.

Hope you have (or maybe don't have) 'one of those days' soon.
S. x

So That Was Autumn...

Apologies for the long absence - I think this is the first time I've ever missed two consecutive months! Can't think where the time went.

So October passed by in whirl of autumn colour, catching up on birthdays (sorry kids!) and a visit from my lovely Mama, a trip to the north and the coast and a little bit of experimental slipper crafting - they turned out just fine with a little tweaking of the pattern, in fact I'm wearing them now.

And as for November? I really have no idea where those thirty days disappeared! But clearly, looking back at the photos, November was a month of home improvements. Sam sorted the moss on the roof, Lee, our lovely, dedicated and endlessly patient joiner (he spent a long time fighting with our wonky walls poor man), built and fitted our bookcase and TV-cabinet-come-gas-meter-cupboard and I finally plucked up the courage to paint with that lovely dark blue - Stiffkey Blue from Farrow and Ball. Don't regret it one bit. The combination of light wood, stone and the deep, dynamic blue that looks so different as the light changes through the day work so well to make this, our favourite room, feel cosy and somehow more grown up and sophisticated.

And now it's midway through December it really is time to crack on with the Christmas preparations... more on this next week once the Nativity performances and parties are done and dusted and I'm home for the holidays. I just can't wait, it's been a long few months!

Hope you had a lovely autumn too friends.

S. x

Wood, Sweat and Manual Labour

After working my brain throughout the week I've always enjoyed letting my muscles take over the work at the weekend. It used to be at the stables, in my teens right the way through to my mid twenties. Spending time out of doors working hands and legs and back and heart with physical tasks gave my mind, usually so taken up with school work (both as a student and a teacher) a chance to wander while my body took on the repetitive, familiar tasks of sweeping the yard, mucking out and bedding down stables, leading young riders and filling up hay nets.

These days I don't have such a regular outlet for this physical need, save for treading the footpaths and fields around home. So, this weekend, faced with a huge pile of logs taking up half of the drive way, I rejoiced in the change to spend a beautiful afternoon shifting them to a more permanent home.

As the cat chased the last of the afternoon sunshine down the garden, I moved load after load in our 8 gallon trug (now missing one handle), first to the log store that Sam built over the summer, which filled before I'd really made a dent in the pile. Then to the old stone outhouse and finally, with that full to bursting, to just outside the back door with the last few.

And of course a few of them made it inside and onto the fire this evening.

Hope you're enjoying your weekend as much as I am.
S. x

Wood is good

Over this first lovely (though slightly cool and damp) summer in our own home I have spent as much time out and about in the beautiful woodland surroundings and the garden as I have inside the house (not to mention my new classroom - more on that another day).

Outside, I have loved sharing this wonderful woodland just a short step up the lane with all of our visitors. We have even come away with a few treasured logs set to become a coffee table, heat pads and of course fire wood. OK, so transporting these great hunks of unwanted logging left overs was, umm, interesting but so worth it when you think about how each piece is a part of nature, has seen years of change and is of course unique in shape and size and the pattern of its rings. We have enjoyed many many outdoor fires in our fire pit with friends and family. I am yet to come across anyone who does not give in to the mesmerising qualities of flickering flames and glowing coals once the sun has gone down.

And inside we have a few woody projects on the go too. The addition of two log burners ready for winter and a soon to be made book case and TV cabinet which we are super excited about. Rustic and beautiful solid oak with rough bark edges wherever possible. A few weeks away yet but we are very excited to see the results.

Enjoy your week lovely people, and if you can, find a little wood of your own and just breathe it in.
S. x