"Is He Good?"

"Is he good?" is something that comes out of people's mouths a lot when they meet a baby for the first time. Sometimes it's friends or family and other times vague aquaintances or total strangers. At first, it didn't bother me too much and I just replied "yes" and smiled thinking it a slightly odd question. Now however, having had time to think about it, it drives me slightly crazy with it's ridiculousness!

What does it mean to 'be good'?
In my mind to 'be good' you need to know and meet other people's expectations of how to 'be good'. A person who has no idea of or understanding of what these expectations are cannot be expected to meet them. Does this mean that because he doesn't sleep through the night, eat a whole bowl of mush without a fuss and go down for naps with ease in the day that Connor is not a good baby? Does it mean that he's a bad baby?

Ridiculous! He's a baby! Not a miniature adult who knows the rules to fit in with the norm. When he's a toddler it will be equally ridiculous, and again at five and ten and fifteen years of age because children and teens aren't mini adults either, they are just a little further along the road to becoming one.

Being 'good' is a pressure that, thankfully, the babies in the world are not yet aware of, even if their parents are. I hope to raise happy, kind, confident little people in time. I'm not in a rush. If they don't conform to the 'good' template at various (or possibly many!) points along the path I don't really mind.

Good manners will come when they come if we use them ourselves and set an example, sleeping through the night will eventually be part of our lives, confidence and independence will grow with support and truly unconditional love. It's not a race and what works for some may not work for others. I'm just hoping to enjoy the journey, day by day, moment by moment because one of these days my little boy will be leaving home and as everyone with grown up children keeps telling me, it really does come round too quickly.

So, my not-so-good baby who doesn't come close to sleeping through the night, only naps attached to me or his Daddy during the day and throws the majority of his food on the floor barely touched, good on you! You're amazing and you're learning everyday to be more and more amazing.

(Had to put a photo in... Blogs are weird with no pictures!...Tuggy box... Instant success for very little effort!)

Rant over...Over and out friends.
S. x